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12 November 2009 @ 07:05 pm
i'm good at feeling
im good at singing
im good at laughing, even if its always too much





being sick is horrible.
ive been coped up at home for the past 2 days with a bloody sore throat and fever. ive tried being productive but needless to say it was a half-hearted attempt. i am dreading finishing up schoolwork whilst having to work the night shift this weekend. crap crap crap.
plus, i got up way too early today, cause of the damn construction outside my window. the slamming of steel is horrendous. but it was kinda fruitful cause i managed to watch you're beautiful as soon as the subs were up.

i think everyone is down with something these days. it must be the weather. i find it fascinating and rather hilarious that the korean celebrities are all coming down with the swine flu.

i got ill on tuesday, which was coincidentally the day the gang wanted to have a picnic at the little island to celebrate my birthday. it was fun, although it was pitch dark and jun got high way to fast and pathetically. i find that im spending more time with them now, which in some ways is great. i miss them wery-wery much. I LURBE YOU GUYS!

i just realised i forgot to mention the bunch that celebrated with me on my birthday. the knick-knack bunch which turned out to be a great clubbing group. we went to phuture, although phuture kinda hmm, sucked, (i love butter more) but we had fun! THANKS YOU VERY MUCH: felulu, ade, chongning, lion, arthur, simon, nic, zhihong and lester! we should totally get arthur drunk on his birthday!

as everyone who knows me knows i am fascinated with children's clothes, needless to say, i would just die to dress my kids, well, it doesn't even have to be my kids, in stella mccartney for gap kids. i feel a damn strong urge to just buy the damn clothes now, and keep in moth-free dry bags for my future children. oh. i am already planning to get nice little baby docs for my niece's birthday in january. it aint cheap, its 35pounds. but so worth the adorable-ness.

and i totally need to find someone with a credit card who will just wait by the laptop with me on 20th december for the rodarte for target collection to be out. so we can snap it up. they have pretty pretty dainty stuff at affordable prices. topshop is also getting on my nerves, why the hell doesnt the uk website deliver outside of uk? yes, singapore has topshop too, and i shop from them every other week, but they have nicer stuff online, plus it seems cheaper than the us site. sighs. speaking of which i need to fly down to ion to grab my topshop unqiue spaceship print skirt soon!

FOR MY LOVELY SISTER! sorry for forgetting about you! i had the best time with you on my birthday. roaming around ion, eating our good ramen, and wandering around haji! I LOVE MY PENGUIN TOO!

the sun is kissing my head
its reminiscing away

 
 
Current Music: Lady GaGa - Bad Romance
 
 
adliboverplay
09 November 2009 @ 09:20 pm
no one cries because they want to




hello? how are you?...

i've just realised that in every single post before ive stated my willingness to update frequently. although that seems to be happening in never ever. school has just started again. this time in the sunny island. fuck it. i bloody hate it. its been a dread going to school. i am working too. which will explain the unlikelihood of this being a frequent source of my outbursts. my birthday has come an gone too. i hate being 19. the day where i'll be a legally responsible adult seems to be just about a corner.

it seems that everyone's blogging these days. or just caught up in showcasing their life for everyone to scrutinize on the big bad world wide web, with facebook, blogs and twitter. ive yet to be caught up in the craze, i fully intend to inch my way up instead. friends seem to be 'a-changing' for me and probably for others, i have no idea why. does it happen cause we get caught up in different aspects of our lives? or do we grow out of our fellow friends. nonetheless, i fully intend to hold on to the ones i have now.

certain aspects of my life and my character dont seem to be changing for the better. and thats with shows. there was a period in september where i was addicted to criminal minds and downloaded season 1 to the current season 5. oh i must say i have a growing love for matthew gray gubler. never will there be a more lovable nerd to me. now, its a cheesy, unrealistic but entertaining korean drama, you're beautiful. imagine a nun-in-training replacing a twin brother's place in an idol band. hilariousness ensues.

hmm. although my posts seem to be always about me. ive decided that my posts here after will still be about me. but with inclusions of friends and family... though i must say. i am very much alone an anti-social. im not very much a people person, no matter how loud and noisy i am on the outside.

goodbye my love, i'll let you go now
i'll erase and erase and empty put every drop of love from my heart

 
 
Current Music: Carla Bruni - Quequ'un M'a Dit
 
 
adliboverplay
27 July 2009 @ 10:35 am
we'll walk around pretending
we're all grown up



Doopey-di-doop. havent udpated in months but here i am stuck at home with a 7 day mc, and i start updating again. 7 day mc. Joy isn't it? NO. i thought so before, but im thinking im going to drive myself nuts soon enough. id better get started on studying for tests.

the past few months have been kinda hectic and well lazy as well. made friends, hung out with new classmates and old friends. procrastinated with studying and project deadlines. till the point where lulu and i, (well, lulu mostly) got by with a miniscule amount of sleep for what? 2 weeks? anyway that's a whole other story. and without fail, dear germaine has been spending money on clothes as though i've won the lottery. im hoping being sick and having no appetite will let me lose a few kg. i need to start saving! for like the new christopher kane for topshop collection!... see. this is why im forever broke broke broke.

kimmik koo is back! she's finally graduated. although she hasn't had her convocation yet. but yeah. im happy for her. and i cant imagine her working. in like formal wear and stuff like that. she looks way too young and erm young. anyway, i think i might have infected her with the influenza as well. if what i have is the influenza. i think i got ill while i was watching a 6 hour movie marathon with her on saturday. and after that i came out feeling really cold and giddy. plus, she and bird stayedover too. sighs.

anyway things to get done this week. some work for dad. studying for tto. studying for bese. studying for prof test 2. doing bese individual portfolio and bese dining thing. yeap yeap. no more procrastinating. that's all folks!

you've got a lovely way with words
must be the way you see the world

 
 
Current Music: The Virgins - Rich Girls
 
 
adliboverplay
23 March 2009 @ 12:52 am
(let's smile) like couples in dramas
(let's smile) like the title of your blog
(let's smile) happy like in my past



 
Lah-di-dah. This school holiday has got to be one of the most boring or lazying one for me. I'm always stuck in front of the tube at home, constantly channel surfing even though id prob have the prog schedules from afternoon to midnight memorised. okay. its actually all my fault.

Had fun for two days in batam though. The villa we stayed in, had a veranda just right next to the sea, so i slept that night with the sound of the waves lullabying me to sleep. ATTENTION, all who are broke but need a breather from stress, batam is the cheapest holiday spot ever. For just a 40min ferry ride away,enjoy bloody fresh cheap seafood for like a quarter the price here, and 1 hour massage sessions for 6bucks! Lord, i sound like an advertisement. I had fun though.

On a different topic, im thinking that i should check my eyes soon. i doubt i have near sightedness, but the number of hours i stare at my laptop and tube per week is definitely more than the number of hours i sleep. which is saying something. since i sleep till 11-12 almost everyday. and have little naps dozing off while watching the telly. i definitely need to catch up on my social life. which is prob why im picking this week as a meetup week for almost everyone. excluding teddy, since she's off to enjoy the sun, sand, sea and exorbant prices on the lovely island of bintan. oh i see money flying not only for her but me this week.

off to macau on sunday anyway. or to be more specific. macau, zhuhai, guangzhou and then hongkong. the pre-retirement bunch are travelling everywhere. and i mean everywhere. will try to stuff myself with delicious desserts in hongkong everyday. it is that bad, i literally dream of hongkong desserts.

being the laptop cum telly couch that i am. i went through about 30 designers full fall 2009 ready-to-wear runway show pictures. i am absolutely loving Balmain, Erin Fetherston and Herve Leger. I swear Balmain's gowns could be avant garde bridal gowns. They would look absolutely fucking gorgeous and special. Their collections are always favourites of mine. Erin Fetherston is so pretty and dainty. Its cuteness with hooped, poufed mini full skirted frocks in black and white. my favourite colours and i love frocks. Herve Leger's bodycon, skin tight dresses, look damn smexy. but it'd only look good on the models that are modeling them, like bone thin smaller than size 0 models, who have no boobs, no hips and no ass. which prob disqualifies like 99% of the females in this world from wearing them. not counting those in third world countries. some other notable mentions would be Akris, Alexander Wang, , Balenciaga, Bodkin, Boy by Band of Outsiders, Charlotte Ronson, Chloe, Christopher Kane, Doo.Ri, Luella, Preen, Richard Nicoll and some of the Central St Martin's Graduates. Salivating over the clothes, i wish there was a alternate universe where i could afford these clothes. maybe in society life?

Everyday I cry, I smile, cry then smile again
What's wrong with me, why do I do this repeatedly?

 
 
Current Music: The Black Skirts - Tangled
 
 
adliboverplay
17 February 2009 @ 06:47 pm
Our separation is but a dream, I know it's hanging there
But why is it so hard to wake up.



School's out. Well, not officially since we have 2 papers that will wrap up the end of our entire school year. And, for some reason im not very nervous about them yet. Haven't posted since ages, if you exclude the previous goodbye post. Life has been rather boring actually, which is why l'il ol me has been staring at things online again. Nope not the local affordable things, but more of the ones that will cost two-third of a month's allowance. But my first priorities would be the chanel vendetta nail poish ($32!) and getting a new ipod, since my ipod has been giving signs that it'll be dying on me soon. An ipod in itself cost $400. not exactly petty cash. And i would have been able to afford it, had i not spent 200plus on two topshop dresses. Topshop is the very devil!

Sighs, and id have to save up for my korea trip as well, which me and kimmik have budgeted about 3800 for everything. its not like 3k+ will be falling from the sky anytime soon. I'm hoping my monotonous ex-job has vacancies and will accept me. I really need the cash. Especially since i'm also saving for this marc by marc jacobs tote ($319), jeffrey cambell crosshatch platforms ($300), fujifilm instant camera white edition ($150), diana+ dreamer edition ($110), gucci by gucci eau de toilette ($90) or the chloe eau de perfume ($160), plus this sharp aquos phone im coveting ($700+) added with the stuff i buy on a weekly basis from urbanoutfitters or zipia, my expenditures are sky high.

oh god, buddha and dear grandmother in heaven why am i such a spendthrift? guess i cant help it. at least i dont ask my parents for cash to buy them. therein lies my only positive trait.

hmm, why oh why do i always talk about clothes or shoes? I dont actually, i have other things to talk about, but they can't be written online for the world to see. Oh on another topic, walking with Na the other day, and we saw porny comics in a rental bookstore AGAIN. My god, what is it with guys who will rent porn that arent even real? We flipped a couple, one one gay relations and one on lesbian and omg, its indescribable, cause everything is drawn in minute detail, not the guy parts but the girl parts, (cause i guess guy parts drawn are illegal? and they are replaced by a banana) and like erm sweat and other fluids that shall not be named, porn vids are less gross than this. Anyway, we were thinking of buying a couple for the little ones in the future, so that when they reach puberty and need to M, it'll come in handy.

La-la-la. off to bury myself in economics, which will not really take off i guess.

My heart filled with gashes, the deep wounds make me want to hate you
Burning photographs, erased from my heart, forgeting all the memories
 
 
Current Music: IU - Missing Child
 
 
adliboverplay
13 February 2009 @ 03:49 pm
Me oh my you thought, you had something strong
Me oh my it turned, out that you were wrong



^the fabulous 8

This is the last day of school.
while angie, kah, gen and lionel are camwhoring, sijia off with her loverboy, and jun with hairy P, brendan writing his love for jun. I am sitting here reminiscing on our past.

Things in poly will never be what it is today without the 7 of you. I remember only knowing sijia on the first day, and the both of us finding solace in each other in the midst of unknowns. although i didnt expect to make great friends here. i did.

although im not as close as you guys as the rest of you are. i'll still rmb our times together. the ex-perverted pals who analyse different erm.... situations. our bus gossiping sessions, our online bitching cyberbullying occasions, the hilarious interpretations of our mother tongue, the hilarious pronaunications, the retardness, and bastarding.

i wish i had spent more time with you guys to foster and get to know each other better, cause sometimes i feel i little like an outsider. even though i hope we will always be with each other for our 3 yrs, that wont be the case. but i'll never regret knowing all of you. you guys are the reason why i bother to come to school everyday.

our favourite quotes of year1.

sah-gession. vel-vat pants. mo-ji-to.

Me oh my your luck, seems to be no more
Fighting to get up, falling to the floor
 
 
Current Music: Lykke Li - Complaint Department
 
 
adliboverplay
20 January 2009 @ 08:04 pm
i'm just a little bit caught in the middle. life is a maze. and love is a riddle.


the edgy-ist, stylish-ist, cute-ist couple ever.






slow it down. make it stop. or else my heart is going to pop. i'm a fool out of love. cause i just can't get enough.




 
 
Current Music: lenka - the show
 
 
adliboverplay
21 October 2008 @ 11:00 pm
Why don't you sit right down and make me smile? You make me feel like I am just a child



Let's just say life has been messy lately.
School's just started out for the week. And things are a whole lot different. Timetables are screwy. And extra subjects like psych and jap have got me all looney.
The holidays wasn't really very memorable for me. since my life was filled with staring at the com everyday doing paperwork. plus the As people are all mugging so its basic common sense not to bother them. other than the very 'happening' chalet 2 weeks ago. lets just say. this has got to be one of the most boring holidays for me ever. thats the problem when you're too busy thinking about earning money.

speaking of which i keep getting enticed to dull coloured clothing. not that its bad. since those colours suit me best. but im afraid it'll come to a point that 99% of my wardrobe will be in tones of white, blue, grey and black other than my undies. this is so random. anyway. ive been salivating at fall/winter shoes lately. boots with sky high heels have always looked great, but totally stupid in humid, hot sunny l'il ol singapore.

books are another obsession of mine. and this korean rapper whose work i respect a lot, [yes i know. rapper? his lyrics are great, and he is a whiz with words. he's alma mater is stanford, and he majored in creative writing.] tablo, has written a book of short stories called Nowhere in New York, which he originally wrote in English but then translated to Korean. Im dying to get my hands on the original unpublished English version.
Any ideas on how to? Be creative, it might work.

my last words; my love for my korean boyband has not died. which is why im still enraptured by jaejoong's six pecs plus junsu's voice. and that is not entirely healthy.


In the halls I’d rather hear silence than the bell of new love.

 
 
Current Music: Passion Pit - Sleepyhead
 
 
adliboverplay
19 September 2008 @ 05:40 pm
The fantasy is simple. Pleasure is good, and twice as much pleasure is better. That pain is bad, and no pain is better. But the reality is different.



damnable teeth. god dammit. im having a splitting headache after my wisdom teeth surgery today. the anesthetic has started to wear off and its hurts like a bitch. why do i have to suffer so much for my damn teeth? anyway life has been a bore these days. im working at my old office job, and lord is it boring, and mechanical. all for moolah im saving to haul my ass up to melbourne next holidays. i guess i cant enjoy life for this weekend, but i can always catch up on dramas.

lusting after fall looks these days. with doc martens, lace up boots, riding boots, plaids, bow dresses, mannish tailoring and the like. my resolution these days is not to spend much on the cheap quality clothes of online blogshops, but on more unique stuff from overseas online sites. urbanoutfitters is a fave site for prawling through awesome clothes. but the prices, oh my goodness, you'd think i won the lottery. ebay is a great site for vintage clothes but paypal is a problem. why oh why doesnt the awesome h&m have and online store? oh and im hoping to get my ass up and start losing weight, i dont care how i start, be it going anorexic (i highly doubt on my ability to starve) or exercising, but god i am going to lose the extra weight and flab. and... i have fetish for heels, so people i take that you're warned. four inch heels here i come!

hmmm, school. well well. my gpa is a complete failure. i seriously need to study and work like mad to get my gpa up. everyone says all work and no play makes one dull. but hell if thats what its going to take for me to get A's. thats all img going to do. but lets just say im going to enjoy the four weeks of holidays i have left.

seeing lovely long locks of hair now make me sad. i want nice long hair back. but im going to stick to short hair till the end of the year with one or two more cuts. then lets just say, you're finally going to see me with long tresses.

The reality is that pain is there to tell us something, and there's only so much pleasure we can take without getting a stomach ache. And maybe that's okay. Maybe some fantasies are only supposed to live in our dreams.

 
 
Current Music: Eternal Morning - Plastic Umbrella
 
 
adliboverplay
14 August 2008 @ 04:26 pm
im that star up in that sky. im the little bit of hope.


its the olmypics period. and dont we all get a little more hyped up about sports during this period of 2 weeks? me and my swimming and gymnastics. kimmik going pervy while watching the tanned tonned bodies of beach volleyball. thank god for the 6-8 free channels we have for the olympics. and the fact that beijing is on the same timezone as us. i dont even want to imagine watching swimming in the wee hours of the morning for the 2012 olympics held in london. i can naturally assume i wont get a chance to go there, cause of the damn high price of pounds.

watching swimming always gets me thinking, what if i hadnt stopped swimming? would i get a shot at the olympics? i dont think its bad to admit that im a good swimmer, but hey its all wishful thinking aint it. but being the klutz that i am id never go far. accomplishments for this week, falling flat on the ground, and having skin blistered on my right knee and elbow. getting hit on the left ankle, so its now swollen and bruised. oh oh oh! plus having the window closed on my thumb! its the highest number of injuries ive ever gotten in a short period so far. like what? 3 days?

tsk anyway. let me show off the prides of my life right now! these 2 atheletes are my faves for the olympics! been watching their games live from the start.


^ sexy undies!             ^cute, and has a great bod. what more can you ask for?

as everyone who knows me, knows that i love kids. especially damn super cutie pie ones. anyway the boy above is now 19 years old. and amazing! he's park taehwan of korea who recently got gold for 400m freestyle and silver for 200m freestyle in the olympics. caught my eye cause he was rumoured to be wondergirl's sunye's boyfriend some months back. the two are church buddies, lord i want a church buddy like that too!


^ guys dont even have muscles like she does.

im super all out for her. shawn johnson of, well, the states. she's amazing. she's only 16. and she's won gold for loads of stuff. trained by a chinese and has the american physique. no wonder she knows she can do it. although the US women's team missed the gold by 2 points. they got silver. and shawn is in 1st placing currently with her individual marks. my other fave, nastia liukin is 2nd. i know im chinese, but hey, i like them better. tmr morning's the women's individual all-around final. i have to thank my clumsiness, cause of my ankle, im not going to school, so hey, get to watch the finals! go shawnie go!

oh wait. one more thing. although its corny and cheesey but i really think One World One Hope, is a fitting theme. toodles.


i can feel it. im the world's greatest.
 
 
 
Current Music: Amy Studt - Furniture
 
 
adliboverplay
26 July 2008 @ 04:39 pm
Ticking of the clock in an empty room, the noise of rain kissing the roof



^ arent these cute. support the upper east siders. god i want one of these tees. i am so for team blair and serena. but arent they on the same team? come come let us 3 sisters have one each.

stuck at home. had a paper this morning at the ungodly hour of 9.30am. woke up super early to beat the jam. buttttt. since its saturday, there seems to be absolutely no sign of traffic. god. i wasted half an hour of sleep. since, ive been home, ive been lusting after the gossip girl team tees on fredflare. if i ever get them, which should i get? team blair or team serena? your pick. your choice. your vote. so choose choose choose. i hope to the lord PJs dont get a look at these.

an iht test next tues. which is disgusting, cause it covers 8 lectures and like what 6 tutorials. thanks for only telling us week before. my god, im going to choke. plus, our fnb project needs to be done latest by wed, one day before the deadline, in case of any unfortunate mishaps, since CD can be such a bitch. plus econs project due next next mon. which is kinda a rush, since we did practically nothing. whoosh. but lucky me got the easiest part.

i honestly swear that sometimes, im kinda mad and delusional. and i have mood swings. which sorta means im back to being the me two years ago. hmmm. there's something for thought. sad and depressed that kimmik is going back to melbourne, where there are vineyards! gasps! please im not that ignorant. i know there are vineyards in melbourne. thank you for mentioning it. oh speaking of which, urban outfitters has an amazing playlist for songs.



You're an umbrella over my head; night with cold rain dripping on my shoulders. you being beside me became a habit of mine; I can't go on without you, alone in the rain.
 
 
Current Music: Lykke Li - Little Bit
 
 
adliboverplay
12 July 2008 @ 11:03 pm

^the COACD tee i never had

holed up in front of the com. feeling bored and started trolling the fashion net. wondering to the lord why i missed out on COACD's limited edition tee on bloodisthenewblack a few months back, the thing is, even ebay cant give me one. one cute little blog is kathyisyourfriend.com, she's COACD's intern if im not wrong, and her photography is eccentric, oh mind the nudities too. then cruised around and found daul kim's blog, she's good. she, hye park and han jin sets the bar for koreans wanting to enter the international runways, although ford model of the year winner hyoni is too cute for words too. linked around and found street style blogs set in seoul. it seems practically all the guys are into raf simons. i love the structure of his designs. it never seems to amaze me how none of the guys in little tiny spore wear raf and don't know highstreet brands from highend designers. i guess not all of us are rich enough to splash out cash like it water, on clothes like the koreans on yourboyhood.com.

how many generations will the trauma of lives continue?

 
 
Current Music: Jang Geun Suk - Black Engine
 
 
adliboverplay
08 July 2008 @ 02:09 pm
crazy crazy life aint what it really seems like.

It started out as a feeling
Which then grew into a hope
Which then turned into a quiet thought
Which then turned into a quiet word

And then that word grew louder and louder
'Til it was a battle cry
I'll come back
When you call me
No need to say goodbye

Just because everything's changing
Doesn't mean it's never been this way before
All you can do is try to know who your friends are
As you head off to the war

Pick a star on the dark horizon
And follow the light
You'll come back when it's over
No need to say goodbye

You'll come back when it's over
No need to say goodbye

Now we're back to the beginning
It's just a feeling and no one knows yet
But just because they can't feel it too
Doesn't mean that you have to forget

Let your memories grow stronger and stronger
'Til they're before your eyes
You'll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye

You'll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye


lazying around the library and skipping lectures are amazing sights.

 
 
Current Music: Amy Studt - She Ran
 
 
adliboverplay
28 June 2008 @ 11:22 pm
Communication. It's the first thing we really learn in life. Funny thing is, once we grow up, learn our words and really start talking the harder it becomes to know what to say. Or how to ask for what we really need.



it just occurred to me that ive never really said anything about the people im with for 5 days a week, which is rather ironic, but also apt, since i spend so much time with them, talking about them isnt exactly very comforting. first up is sijia, she's the one thats short and pretty, okay all of the girls are short and pretty. and ditches us nonstop for the siglap bunch and whatnot. my very own eating buddy! next is brendan, who is our half girl servant, one thats sorta of the other gender among us five girls, the song 'im not a girl not yet a woman' applies, but in another context. he's our very own tissue boy.  third is angie, our resident kinda bimbotic taitai, who has this peeve of eating rather graciously, and who is utterly stubborn, but a BFF although that doesnt seem like the case these days. [note: please dont be an idiot to take a roundabout bus ride]. then we have gen, my little other korean buddy, who is forever bossing the lot of us to vote for bigbang. i bet im the only one who votes practically every 10mins. finally rebekah. our resident online shopper, kinda like me, just alot more erm enthusiastic. she is who, that affects everyone around to shop too. and loves to Zzz in classes, not that i dont but, she achieves it the impossible way. there are alot more details and little quirks that each one of them has, and well, you'd have to know them to find out.

my little habit these days, is finding inspirational fashion blogs online, im not sure what i can do with the pics i save, other than inspiration for outfits. but if you know me really well, you'd know that i have this kinda creative way of cutting up stuff and creating a rather nice collage. my secondary school book covers used to be all glammed and nicely covered up. plus i have this huge notebook that i dont seem to have any use for since only about one fifth of it is filled with notes on brave new world, which i no longer need. so i might have the itch one day to fill it up as a fashion notebook. i will work on it. if i ever feel up to cutting up my precious magazines, and sitting there lost in time, papers and glue.

one a brighter note. miss kimmik koo is coming back next tues. there are no words to describe how happy and elated and joyous i am to have her back. seriously i can only shop with her or bird. we are the SHOPPING CREW please. oh speaking of shopping, god, i need to have some fake thrift swoop event soon to unveil the clothes ive bought and hidden with my mother knowing. my pile of hidden clothes, just keep growing and growing.

well, then with IHT project meeting tomorrow to finish up what we have to hand in on sunday, god i hate projects, and a probable new extra phone.  im off to have a heavenly nice bathe and knock off early for once. oh and who will take the cup on monday morning? my native people of the land of sausages? of the handsome tanned chiseled charismatic spainards? too bad for macro econs lecture on monday, you wont be graced with the honor of my presence.

At the end of the day, there are some things you just can't help but talk about. Some things we just don't want to hear, and some things we say because we can't be silent any longer. Some things are more than what you say, they're what you do. Some things you say because there's no other choice. Some things you keep to yourself. And not too often, but every now and then, some things simply speak for themselves.
 
 
Current Music: Audrey Hepburn - Moon River
 
 
adliboverplay
I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.


And I'd give up forever to touch you
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything seems like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive

And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am


hung up on City of Angels. cried with Iris. do i even know who i am?
 
 
Current Music: Goo Goo Dolls - Iris
 
 
adliboverplay
22 June 2008 @ 03:48 pm
Time takes pleasure in kicking our asses. For even the strongest of us it seems to play tricks. Slowing down... hovering until it freezes. Leaving us stuck in a moment- unable to move in one direction or the other.

the two weeks of holidays, have passed in a flash. most of it, lazying my ass around at home. but hey i managed to cram some time between my lazying for a day out with nic and three days in sunny tioman with teddy. needless to say, the sun has no effect on me, im never ever going to be a nice healthy colour.




to my dear KIMMIK KOO fly back soon! i miss you like everything in the world combined!


Time waits for no man. Time heals all wounds. All any of us can want is more time. Time to stand up. Time to grow up. Time to let go. Time.
                       
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Current Music: The Beatles - Yesterday
 
 
adliboverplay
07 June 2008 @ 01:47 am
That life is full of vanishing acts. If something that we didn't know we had disappears, do we miss it?

life is a whirlwind these days. havent updated in ten years. and when i was writing out a perfectly nice post, like what two mins ago. the damn ass firefox had to close by itself. anyway, ive decided to try, and i really mean try. to update my online self for like at least once a week, when honestly speaking i know ive always said it and it doesnt happen cause truthfully i dont really mean it. anyway, on another note. germaine these days mean. stalking my 'watching' items on ebay. a compulsive online window shopping whore. a physical window shopping whore. fixating on maxi dress, just because she's tall enough to wear them. down with the flu. coughing out phlegm with blood. drowsy and kinda tipsy on flu meds. being on an emotional rollercoaster watching old episodes of grey's anatomy, when its not really all that sad,  and crying while blowing her nose. enriching her gambling life by playing dai di on viwawa. speaking of which. viv are you sure you didnt create viwawa cause it seriously sounds like you.

well after two weeks of holiday, i'll be really glad to know the results of the three subjects that i hate. these are the three most hated subjects of mine. like what the hell right. dammit my gpa is falling faster than superman on dope. oh KIM KOO. i am serious about going out to mel to see you during my mid-semester holidays. although it costs a bomb just on the measly air tickets, and my darling mummy and daddy will not fork a single cheap cent. its literally a thousand bucks plus just for the air fare. lordie. i'll try my very best to save money, cause i want to go over there and join you, and we can go on a shopping frenzy and all that. i need a way to earn money fast. sighs. can money drop from the sky?


Like I said, disappearances happen, pains go phantom, life stops running, and people...people fade away. There's more I have to say...so much more, but I disappeared.

 
 
Current Location: in the midst of drowsiness.
Current Music: regina spektor - the call
 
 
adliboverplay
03 June 2008 @ 10:48 pm
On Seeing the 100% Perfect Girl One Beautiful Morning
by Haruki Murakami

One beautiful April morning, on a narrow side street in Tokyo's fashionable Harujuku neighborhood, I walked past the 100% perfect girl.

Tell you the truth, she's not that good-looking. She doesn't stand out in any way. Her clothes are nothing special. The back of her hair is still bent out of shape from sleep. She isn't young, either - must be near thirty, not even close to a "girl," properly speaking. But still, I know from fifty yards away: She's the 100% perfect girl for me. The moment I see her, there's a rumbling in my chest, and my mouth is as dry as a desert.

Maybe you have your own particular favorite type of girl - one with slim ankles, say, or big eyes, or graceful fingers, or you're drawn for no good reason to girls who take their time with every meal. I have my own preferences, of course. Sometimes in a restaurant I'll catch myself staring at the girl at the next table to mine because I like the shape of her nose.

But no one can insist that his 100% perfect girl correspond to some preconceived type. Much as I like noses, I can't recall the shape of hers - or even if she had one. All I can remember for sure is that she was no great beauty. It's weird.

"Yesterday on the street I passed the 100% girl," I tell someone.

"Yeah?" he says. "Good-looking?"

"Not really."

"Your favorite type, then?"

"I don't know. I can't seem to remember anything about her - the shape of her eyes or the size of her breasts."

"Strange."

"Yeah. Strange."

"So anyhow," he says, already bored, "what did you do? Talk to her? Follow her?"

"Nah. Just passed her on the street."

She's walking east to west, and I west to east. It's a really nice April morning.

Wish I could talk to her. Half an hour would be plenty: just ask her about herself, tell her about myself, and - what I'd really like to do - explain to her the complexities of fate that have led to our passing each other on a side street in Harajuku on a beautiful April morning in 1981. This was something sure to be crammed full of warm secrets, like an antique clock build when peace filled the world.

After talking, we'd have lunch somewhere, maybe see a Woody Allen movie, stop by a hotel bar for cocktails. With any kind of luck, we might end up in bed.

Potentiality knocks on the door of my heart.

Now the distance between us has narrowed to fifteen yards.

How can I approach her? What should I say?

"Good morning, miss. Do you think you could spare half an hour for a little conversation?"

Ridiculous. I'd sound like an insurance salesman.

"Pardon me, but would you happen to know if there is an all-night cleaners in the neighborhood?"

No, this is just as ridiculous. I'm not carrying any laundry, for one thing. Who's going to buy a line like that?

Maybe the simple truth would do. "Good morning. You are the 100% perfect girl for me."

No, she wouldn't believe it. Or even if she did, she might not want to talk to me. Sorry, she could say, I might be the 100% perfect girl for you, but you're not the 100% boy for me. It could happen. And if I found myself in that situation, I'd probably go to pieces. I'd never recover from the shock. I'm thirty-two, and that's what growing older is all about.

We pass in front of a flower shop. A small, warm air mass touches my skin. The asphalt is damp, and I catch the scent of roses. I can't bring myself to speak to her. She wears a white sweater, and in her right hand she holds a crisp white envelope lacking only a stamp. So: She's written somebody a letter, maybe spent the whole night writing, to judge from the sleepy look in her eyes. The envelope could contain every secret she's ever had.

I take a few more strides and turn: She's lost in the crowd.

Now, of course, I know exactly what I should have said to her. It would have been a long speech, though, far too long for me to have delivered it properly. The ideas I come up with are never very practical.

Oh, well. It would have started "Once upon a time" and ended "A sad story, don't you think?"

Once upon a time, there lived a boy and a girl. The boy was eighteen and the girl sixteen. He was not unusually handsome, and she was not especially beautiful. They were just an ordinary lonely boy and an ordinary lonely girl, like all the others. But they believed with their whole hearts that somewhere in the world there lived the 100% perfect boy and the 100% perfect girl for them. Yes, they believed in a miracle. And that miracle actually happened.

One day the two came upon each other on the corner of a street.

"This is amazing," he said. "I've been looking for you all my life. You may not believe this, but you're the 100% perfect girl for me."

"And you," she said to him, "are the 100% perfect boy for me, exactly as I'd pictured you in every detail. It's like a dream."

They sat on a park bench, held hands, and told each other their stories hour after hour. They were not lonely anymore. They had found and been found by their 100% perfect other. What a wonderful thing it is to find and be found by your 100% perfect other. It's a miracle, a cosmic miracle.

As they sat and talked, however, a tiny, tiny sliver of doubt took root in their hearts: Was it really all right for one's dreams to come true so easily?

And so, when there came a momentary lull in their conversation, the boy said to the girl, "Let's test ourselves - just once. If we really are each other's 100% perfect lovers, then sometime, somewhere, we will meet again without fail. And when that happens, and we know that we are the 100% perfect ones, we'll marry then and there. What do you think?"

"Yes," she said, "that is exactly what we should do."

And so they parted, she to the east, and he to the west.

The test they had agreed upon, however, was utterly unnecessary. They should never have undertaken it, because they really and truly were each other's 100% perfect lovers, and it was a miracle that they had ever met. But it was impossible for them to know this, young as they were. The cold, indifferent waves of fate proceeded to toss them unmercifully.

One winter, both the boy and the girl came down with the season's terrible inluenza, and after drifting for weeks between life and death they lost all memory of their earlier years. When they awoke, their heads were as empty as the young D. H. Lawrence's piggy bank.

They were two bright, determined young people, however, and through their unremitting efforts they were able to acquire once again the knowledge and feeling that qualified them to return as full-fledged members of society. Heaven be praised, they became truly upstanding citizens who knew how to transfer from one subway line to another, who were fully capable of sending a special-delivery letter at the post office. Indeed, they even experienced love again, sometimes as much as 75% or even 85% love.

Time passed with shocking swiftness, and soon the boy was thirty-two, the girl thirty.

One beautiful April morning, in search of a cup of coffee to start the day, the boy was walking from west to east, while the girl, intending to send a special-delivery letter, was walking from east to west, but along the same narrow street in the Harajuku neighborhood of Tokyo. They passed each other in the very center of the street. The faintest gleam of their lost memories glimmered for the briefest moment in their hearts. Each felt a rumbling in their chest. And they knew:

She is the 100% perfect girl for me.

He is the 100% perfect boy for me.

But the glow of their memories was far too weak, and their thoughts no longer had the clarity of fouteen years earlier. Without a word, they passed each other, disappearing into the crowd. Forever.

A sad story, don't you think?

Yes, that's it, that is what I should have said to her.

 
 
Current Location: on the edge of loveland.
Current Music: yael naim : new soul
 
 
 
 

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